Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Happy Belated Holidays and a Happy New Year!

I know it has been forever, but I have an excuse! A really good one at that! I have been traveling around the United States for the last 2 weeks visiting family for the holidays. So before I get into that, Happy Holidays to all my unfortunate readers :) I hope your holidays were prosperous and full of great family and cheer.

So where have I been? Well---If I don't count airports it doesn't seem so vast, but I spent a majority of my time split between Phoenix and Northern Illinois. My husband's daughter from his first (and unsucessful) marriage, lives in AZ and with him deploying soon he wanted to go and see her. Given our quick relationship and its escalating status, I had never met her until now. I've always been known as the girl with not a motherly bone in her body, and just the sight of a child gives me anxiety. Thus, my friends were very interested to see just how all of this unfolded. But I care to think I did very well entertaining and getting to know a smart, chatty (yet bratty) 4 year old.

I had a blast and can't say I didn't leave there with the itch of us having our own. B even commented on how surprisingly motherly I was being. Gold Star for me! I definitely am still a huge fan of the Puppy first, Baby second method. And btw...Arizona is BEAUTIFUL!

From Arizona we went to Illinois. This is were all B's family was from so it was interesting to be involved with holiday traditions that aren't your own families. I had yet to meet his family either, so that added a whole new twist. The 6 days we were there I'm pretty much all we did was eat. B used to be a fat kid as well so eating at all his favorite local places was quite a task. We still didn't get everywhere I'll try to remember everything I ate ---

Harris Pizza
Happy Joes Pizza
A Beef Tongue Sandwich (yea, don't ask about this one. haha)
A Waffle
Amerimexican Food
Country Style ice cream
Beer, beer, and more beer
Christmas Eve dinner (pizza, fried chicken, dips, fudge, cookies, pie)
Christmas Day dinner (turkey, ham, mashed potatoes, Rolls, Sweet Potatoes)

And that's all I can remember. I'd also like to add there was little to no exercise in there! Woo. Talk about putting on the Holiday pound. I'm sad to admit, but I've managed to gain 6 lbs! 6!!

We came back home to a snow storm, which doesn't happen around these parts--- ever. So the place went into a standown. I finally made it to the gym today. I missed my Personal Training appointment on Monday due to snow and rescheduled my ass kicking for Friday. Today was a light day, because I really didn't want to do it, but knew needed to. That 6 lbs is staring me in the face.

I had a lot of fun on vacation, but I wish I could do things in moderation! What I did and ate was pretty much the opposite of moderation and it showed on the scale. At least I know that I've got to get my butt back in the gym if I want to get back to where I was and closer to my goal!

Oh! And Santa Claus brought me some weightlifting gloves! No more calluses for me! I look forward to trying them out.


Sunday, December 12, 2010

Weddings and Weight Lifting Gloves

My husband and I got married in May, at a very impromptu ceremony at the local courthouse without my parents or any of my friends knowledge. With him being in the Navy, I just wasn't comfortable with the love of my life going out to sea without being married, so much to my parents and friends dismay we did it anyway.  We had decided on a "wedding" day and were planning a wedding while most people didn't even know we already were married. The guilt got to me, and I ended up telling close friends and family that we were already married, but still wanted to do a ceremony in front of both our family and friends. Currently, we have a recommitment ceremony planned for October of next year, near our 2 year anniversary.

Yesterday, I headed to the Bridal store to go order THE dress. It was one I tried on and cried when they put on the I knew it was what I wante.d.  Or so I thought. While at the store, I tried on the original dress I fell in love with. Which looked like this....
Pretty much hell bent on this purchase, the saleswomen asks when my wedding is and then suggest another dress they had just got in. It looked similar to the one I had picked out before, but was in a heavier fabric and a little less "beachy" looking. I gave it a try, thinking there is no way it would blow this other dress out of the water....but I'll be damned--- It did. It was the prettiest dress I've ever seen. Also more 100 dollars more expensive. But it was perfect. I went in to buy my dream dress and left ordering one that was even more perfect. I guess sometimes it's good to step away for awhile and broaden your horizons! I'd love to post a pic, but I'd hate for B to lurk on the blog and see it! Ruin all the excitment :)

But after my stressful and expensive afternoon, I spent the evening at the gym. Surprise, suprise. :) I tried out some new things and finally worked up the nerve to use the row machine. Wow. That thing is a butt kicker! As well as a blister maker! I was on it for about 15 minutes and 2500M and left with blisters! I then went to do some ab exercises and some assisted dips and chinups and before I knew it my hands were raw.

Number 1 on my christmas list this year is some liftig gloves! I have a feeling I have not only blisters in my future, but lots of lovely calluses and we all know and love how awesome calluses feel. Really feminine...haha

Today is a quiet day, B is supposed to be home from his 10 day cruise, but he'll probably have to work tonight so chances of im being home today is slim. I miss him. I just want him home!  We're leaving Thursday for a trip to Phoenix and then heading up to Illinois for the holidays! It shoud be a nice little vacation. We both need it! I'm hoping I can stay on track with my eating so I don't gain back the 7 lbs I've worked so hard to lose!

Hope you have a fantastic weeked!


Friday, December 10, 2010

Doing the right thing.

I made the mistake of knowing I didnt eat enough today. I've been trying these Lean Shakes from GNC as a meal replacement for lunch, and they're actually pretty good and satisfying, but if I don't counter it with a snack about 2 hours later my stomach is not a happy camper!

I came home from work today completely famished, and just couldn't shake the idea of pizza from my head. I drove past two grocerty stores, strugglng to not stop and get a frozen, calorie dense pizza to just inhale. Somehow I made it home pizza free! I got out of the car and up to the doorstep, and naturally hanging on my doorknob was a flyer for pizza. I made it all way to the computer, had three tabs open from three different pizza places trying to figure out what I wanted to eat and what was the cheapest --- I'm not sure what happened, but I then made an stern decision inside my head saying, "No. You don't need it." I closed all the tabs and the computer and went to the kitchen.   GOOD DECISION #1.

(Questionable) GOOD DECISION #2. I've been a workout queen the last few days, and was on the fence all day about going to the gym just because I didn't feel like running or the ellipitcal and there wasn't any classes striking my fancy this evening.  I'm not sure what's going on, but I was at work and my right hip started hurting. Because this is kind of what I do, I have an idea of what might be going on in there. Athletic trainers are always the worst patients because we never practice what we preach. I ultimately knew that if I didn't take a day off, I'll end up making something as simple as simple inflammation into a bigger problem I'll have to continue to deal with. So I'm taking the day off....fully off. And I have to say I'm a bit anxious about it! But I know its the right thing to do, and is ultimately a good deicison. I just have to keep reminding myself of that.

So being the exciting married, 25 year old woman I am, I'm going to spend the evening doing laundry and cleaning. I'm hoping B's ship may be pulling in early and I'll see him sooner rather than later. And lord knows I don't want him knowing what the house really looks like when he's away haha :)

I'm liking this Blog Hop train I jumped on. I've found many new blogs that I can read and hopefully gain some support and insight on this weightloss/diet journey!


Blog Hop! :)

Share your blog and your journey! Click here to join!

An actually entry coming soon! I've got lots of blogs to read now :)

Thursday, December 9, 2010

When the Cat's away....

The mouse will play..... in the gym?!


Yea, you read that right. I've realized when B is gone, my semi-empty life is easily filled by hours at the gym.  He's been gone for roughly a week and I have been at the gym for at least an hour all of those days except one. I feel I may be getting slightly obsessed with it, but its much better than being obsessed with eating an entire chocolate cake --- right?

Then several nights ago, I got out of work early and thought it would be best to leave the all too quiet house and head to the gym. I made it to the gym around 4 PM, stayed for three fitness classes and rode the stationary bike. I left the gym 3 hours later with1800 ecalories burned. I felt very accomplished and severely famished) but wondered if it was heatlhy. Physically, I'm sure my body needed it, but mentally--- ?

The gym I go to has the Les Mills fitness classes, and boy do these things mean business! My favorite so far for sweating is the BodyCombat. It's fast-paced, energetic, and has great music. I burned almost 900 calories in a 45 minute class! It's like Tae-bo on steroids....

But I have to admit the most enjoyable class I take is the BodyJam class. I am THE WORST dancer, but in my head I think I look good. So this class is perfect because I can try to be hip hop and still burn a buttload of calories. I can embrace my inner stripper and cheerleader in this class. Classes tend to be small too, so the amount of people humilate myself in front of is limited...thank goodnes.

(and I look exacly like that girl) sure.

But anyway---To top it off all that cardio and the long night at the gym, I had a personal training appointment that next morning at 7am and was way too sore for my own good. He kicked my ass real good, and left me sore leaving the gym. I woke up today, tried to get out of bed and it felt as though my muscles had all decided to go on strike. It was a slow moving morning, but by the afternoon I felt normal enough again, so I went today and did a light work out, bike, elliptical, incline treadmill. Surprisingly enough, I think it did the trick! I feel pretty great! I'm already planning my trip to the gym tomorrow!

I miss B. A lot. It's his birthday today and he's floating somewhere in the Atlantic (?) I think. I sent him a birthday email, a birthday text, and so many birthday thoughts and still have yet to hear from him. I need to get used to not hearing from him a lot, but its hard. Especially, when the few friends I have around here are always busy, and I'm left alone with my thoughts, and my full refridgerator. I have to admit though, working out does negate the ideas of eating. I hate to put all that effort into busting my ass and then just eating whatever.

Tomorrow if my last day of work, and then it's vacation til te 27th. I'm pretty excited. I love my job (to an extent) but can't wait to not go there. I'm not sure what I'll be doing with all this free time, but I will promise it won't be all spent at the gym. I'll try and do a tasteful amount. :)

How much is too much working out or is there such a thing? If you have answer, let me know!

Sunday, December 5, 2010

First things first---

I've been wanting to do this for awhile, and I'm hoping I'll soon have the time and/or things to talk about.  If you're reading this, I'm not sure how you found it or which wrong link you clicked on --- but don't hit the back button just yet!

Let me give you a taste of what this blog is going to be about.  I'm in a semi-new state, newly married to a man in the US Navy (going on 6 months now), and have been battling my weight for as long as I can remember.  I hope to use this blog to discuss my journey dealing with my emotions with my husband being away on deployment (coming the beginning of the year) and my weight loss battle that I just can't seem to win.

As I mentioned before, I've battle my weight for as long as I can remember. I've always been chubby (borderline fat) ever since I could walk. It didn't seem to be a problem, til I started noticing that my weight did affect the way I was treated by everyone around me. In high school, I was known as the "funny girl, with a pretty face, and a great personality" and I was okay with that. It wasn't until college that I felt that that label just wasn't enough. I became depressed about my weight and didn't really know how to fix it. Before I graduated college in 2007 I was up to 234 pounds. 

I moved to a different state to start my Masters degree, and there something just 'clicked' I started Weight Watchers, and lost about 70 lbs easy, and got down to 160ish through diet and exercise. And suprising I kept it off, until I moved again---

And here I am.  I started off great once I moved-- completed several half marathons, and ran numerous races--- and then I met the love of my life. We all know how this goes---I somehow accumilated 15 lbs of fat and none of my old clothes fit me quite the way they used to.  The husband, B, has been coming and going preparing for deployment and with that my appetite has done the same.

My name is Jennifer, and I'm an emotional eater. A horrible one at that! When I just don't know what else to do, why not go buy a whole pizza and do whatever you can to fit it all in? Or how about go buy a box of premade brownies and eat them continuously until you want to vomit? With B leaving soon, I want to find a new way to cope with these feelings of loneliness and him being gone. I've done my best to make the first step:


I thought it would be a productive way to spend my time, better myself, and in the process help ease my mind. I hope that between this and blogging I'll be able to keep myself accountable as well as keep my emotions a little bit more under control.

Well until next time!